Beyond Strength: Understanding Men’s Hidden Battles 

On International Men’s Day, we celebrate not just the men we know but the worlds they carry within themselves. These are worlds that are often quiet, often unseen, yet incredibly profound. 

For generations, society has painted men as protectors, providers, and anchors — the ones who must always have the answers, hold the weight, and stay unshaken. But beneath those expectations lies a truth we often overlook: men are human too, beautifully vulnerable in ways they rarely express. 

We are quick to criticise men, point out their flaws, and count their imperfections. Yet we often forget to appreciate them for their presence, their commitment, and the hard work they put in every single day. So much of what they do goes unspoken, unnoticed, and quietly taken for granted. 

Expectations Begin in Childhood 

From an early age, boys are told to be strong and responsible. They grow up hearing that one day they will be the heir of the family, the pillar for aging parents, the one who must hold everything together. They are conditioned to carry responsibilities long before they understand what responsibilities truly are. 

They are taught not to cry, not to express fear, not to show weakness. And in fulfilling all these roles, their own feelings are often the first thing they learn to suppress. 

The Misunderstandings Men Live With 

Society often generalises men, expecting emotional toughness, financial stability, and endless resilience. But few stop to see the emotional cost of those expectations. 

Many men become silent victims of conflicts they never created. 

They get caught between their mother and wife, trying to maintain peace without hurting either. They are misunderstood by their children, who sometimes see them as strict or distant, even when they are simply trying to protect. 

And in their workplaces, if they choose to prioritise family for even a moment, they are judged as unambitious or lazy. 

Wherever they go, someone expects something from them. 

Men’s Mental Health: The Conversation We Need 

Men struggle with mental health far more silently than we realise. Not because they feel less, but because they have been conditioned to feel quietly. They are taught to be strong, but never taught that true strength can also mean asking for help or admitting they are tired. 

Many men carry emotional burdens without a sigh because they fear disappointing the people who rely on them. Their hearts ache, their minds feel heavy, and their souls sometimes feel lost. But they continue moving, often without a complaint.

Emotional Vulnerability Is Not Weakness 

Men feel deeply, sometimes more intensely than they show. They worry, they overthink, they experience loneliness, and they deal with self-doubt that no one sees. They fight silent battles simply because they don’t know whether they are allowed to express them. 

Vulnerability does not make a man less. It simply makes him human. 

The Desire to Take a Back Seat 

Men do not always want to lead. Not every day. Not every moment. 

Sometimes they want to sit back, not financially but emotionally and mentally. They want someone else to take the decisions, choose the direction, or carry the moment while they breathe, recover, or simply rest. 

They long for a safe space where they can be held instead of always being the one who holds everything together. 

The Wish to Be in the Shadows for a Moment 

Men are expected to guide, fix, decide, and lead. But there are days when they wish to stay in the background and let their partner shine while they support quietly. 

Not because they lack confidence, but because constantly being the leader is exhausting. Sometimes all they want is a moment where they do not have to be strong, a moment where they can simply be themselves. 

The Weight of Decision-Making 

Decision-making is not just a responsibility for many men. It is a pressure. Whether it is about family matters, finances, or personal struggles, they are expected to know what to do and to choose correctly every time. 

But men doubt themselves too. They fear making the wrong choice. They feel overwhelmed by expectations they rarely speak about. Behind every confident face is a man who has questioned himself countless times. 

Let’s Give Men the Space They Deserve 

Let us honour the emotional reality of men. Let us remind them that it is perfectly alright to pause, to feel, to lean, and to break. 

It is alright to not have all the answers. 

It is alright to seek comfort instead of always giving it.

It is alright to be vulnerable, unsure, soft, or exhausted. 

Men do not need to be superhuman. 

They simply need the freedom to be human. 

To the Men in Our Lives 

Thank you for carrying so much, even when no one notices. 

Thank you for loving deeply, even when the world misunderstands you. 

Thank you for staying strong, and thank you for the courage you show when you are not strong at all. 

We see you. 

We appreciate you. 

And we stand with you. 

Here’s to healthier minds, fuller hearts, and the freedom to express every emotion you’ve been taught to hide.

By Upasana Changkakoti

Upasana Changkakoti – A small scale business woman by day, a counselor & addiction advocate by passion. TSS is my love child and the reason for my confidence and growth.