Introduction: A Quiet Strength
Dad was a quiet person, not given to overt expression of emotions. My mom was more expressive. She never minced her words if she had to scold us and we, duly admonished, would mend our ways. Dad never scolded, but a look from him or a single word was enough for us to stay on track. His love, however, was unmistakable. It was there in the little things he did for us. I vividly recall how he used to wake up my sisters and me in the morning to get ready for school, while Mom busied herself with chores in the kitchen. He was actively involved in home responsibilities and our upbringing. One of the most memorable images that remains in my mind is of him chopping veggies to ease mom’s work. He would dice onions, ginger, or even green chilies into tiny pieces of equal sizes with utmost patience that would have put Job to shame!
Early Life: An Unwavering Commitment
Having lost his father at a very early age, the family was beset with financial difficulties. At the age of 18, he left home to join the army. In later years, he would tell us stories about his military days, including his wartime experiences. Following a critical illness, he had to leave the army. Life took a turn when he shifted to Kolkata. A new journey began. This journey in turn shaped the life of his family. His daughters were born in this vibrant city which gave them an education and their careers.
Equality and Empowerment: His Daughters, No Less Than Sons
This was one of the most beautiful parts of our lives. At no point did our parents express regret at not having sons. Neither did they make us feel any less than a son. We were taught to be strong, independent, and empowered in every sense of the term. Funnily enough, Dad was very protective of us. He would never let us travel alone in a cab!
Upholding Values: A Gentle Reminder
We were never allowed to miss school. Even today, missing a day from work is something that happens under very extenuating circumstances. He was very particular about the way we interacted with people. I remember an occasion when I was talking to a friend over the phone and jokingly called her an idiot. He reprimanded me for having said that. I still find it difficult to call a friend an idiot!
Family First: Unconditional Love
The focus of his life was the family. His love was unconditional and the well being of the family, his top priority. In his last days, as he battled for life in the hospital, he kept asking about us. That remains with me till date.
The Perks of Being Youngest: Cherished Moments
I am the youngest in the family and true enough, I was the pampered one. Family outings invariably ended up with me sitting perched on Dad’s shoulders because my legs were tired. A tantrum would often get me what I wanted. I still remember insisting on getting a new dress for a function. He gave in and got me one. I was pleased as punch!
Legacy of Love: A Bittersweet Remembrance
He left on the 18th of June, 1998. With time, the churning within that followed has melted into a silence of acceptance. We have learned to live, not with the absence but with the memories that have etched a space within our hearts. We talk about him now and then, remembering the things he did or liked.
A Timeless Presence
Today, as I write this piece, I am transported into a time when life had another flavour – another fragrance. We’ve come a long way, and though he’s no longer with us, we find comfort in believing that he’s watching over us. I am reliving moments that have faded into the past and there is a bitter-sweet ache. One thing is certain – I’m grateful to have been raised by wonderful parents, and I wouldn’t trade the life I have for anything in the world.
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